Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Liza Interviews Reckless Rescue by Rinelle Grey

Morning Peeps! We've got a Reckless Rescue by Rinelle Grey to interview today. 

Space Rep: Sounds chaotic. 


Liza: I rather like chaos, so let's pull out the transporter and start the interview.

You haven't been using it for a microwave any more, I hope.

Space Rep: No, my food just disappeared. However, it makes a great garbage disposal.



Liza: What? You dope, that garbage is going--




Book: Thank God, I'm out! The stench of garbage in Rinelle's ship is overwhelming.

Liza: Welcome Reckless....may I call you Reckless, or would you prefer RR?

Book: Are you talking to me?

Liza: Yes. I've been endowed with the special gift of book talking. So what do you wish to be called?

Book: RR sounds like a drunken dog's bark, so I'll go with Reckless.

Liza: Excellent. Can you tell me about yourself?

Reckless: You want ME to tell you about your book? Wow! No one has ever interviewed me before. Glad I escaped the ship and left Rinelle to clean up all that garbage that appeared out of nowhere.

Liza: Me too. So start talking.

Reckless: You've no idea how badly our spaceship reeks. I don't even have a nose, and the odor was making my pages curl.

Liza: Close your covers and focus on yourself. What are you about?

Reckless: I am a story that asks my characters what will they risk for love.

Liza: As long as you don't ask me, I'm good. So what's the story about?

Reckless: Marlee’s people are dying—the valuable anysogen gas that covers their planet is making the entire population infertile.


Liza: That's a problem. I imagine breeding becomes then number one priority and love takes a back seat.

Reckless: Exactly. When the council tells her she must leave her partner and choose another to improve her chances of having a baby, she’s devastated. She swears she’ll never love again—it hurts too much.

Liza: This is terrible, so what happens?

Reckless: A spaceship from another world crashes onto her planet. Inside is Tyris.


Liza:  Is he the hero?


Reckless: Tyris thought he had everything he wanted, despite his world suffering from overpopulation—until his wife leaves him because he is forbidden to have children.



In an attempt to convince his world, and his wife, that he’s worthwhile, Tyris goes hunting for a lost planet said to contain untold riches in the form of anysogen gas.

Liza: So their worlds have the exact opposite problems. That's an interesting twist. Love suffers at either extreme where governments take over the decisions. 

Reckless: That is true.

Liza: So what happens?

Reckless: When he crashes on her world, Marlee and Tyris agree to pretend to live together while they try to repair his ship and escape from the planet. 

Liza: I can see why he'd want off the planet. Soon he'll become sterile as well. So what happens next?

Reckless: As they battle the harsh winter on the planet together, keeping their distance becomes even more challenging than the snow, the council and the risks of a real relationship…

Liza: They get frisky, don't they?

Reckless: I don't believe that word appears anywhere within my covers.

Liza: They grind the gristmill?

Reckless: Definitely not in my covers.

Liza: Do the salsa?

Reckless: Nope.

Liza: Then open up your covers and let me see what words you do have.

Reckless: All right, but no writing in your nonsensical expressions.

Liza: I won't.

Excerpt:

The door closed behind them, and Nelor heaved a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Marlee. I wish I’d been able to give you a baby.”

“It’s not your fault,” Marlee squeezed her eyes shut for a moment. “It could just as easily be me.” She reached out to take his hands, not caring if he saw her tears. She didn’t need to pretend in front of Nelor. Of all the people in the village, he was one of the few she could be herself around. And now he had to leave.

Tears glistened in his eyes too. “I hope things work out for you next time.” It was a standard response. Expected.

She didn’t want to hear it. “I don’t want to do this again,” she said quietly. “I can’t.”

Nelor brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Yes you can. You’re one of the strongest people I know. And I know you’ll make a wonderful mother someday. Don’t let what we’ve shared stop you from achieving that.”

She didn’t feel strong. She wasn’t like her mother. She couldn’t live the way her mother had. “It’s not just about having a baby. I don’t want to be with someone else, live a life with them that should have been with you.”

She didn’t want to spend her days with someone she couldn’t be open with, couldn’t cry in front of, or, worst of all, someone she was afraid of.

“We don’t have any choice, Marlee. The council’s rules apply equally to everyone. And if they didn’t, where would we be? Our population would drop even more quickly. We might not like the idea of changing partners so often, but it’s the only way to make sure there even is a next generation.” He sounded like he was trying to convince himself.

Marlee shook her head. She didn’t want to hear it even though she knew it was true. She and Nelor could have been happy together. They had been.
***
Liza: Aha! So you use words such as sharing and having a baby. Subtle.

Space Rep: *dabs eyes with tissue* Can I have the buy links. This sound wonderful.

Liza: I agree.



Liza: Before I send you back to your garbage filled spaceship- *glares at Space Rep* is there anything you'd like to say?

Reckless: Yes. I would like to thank my author, Rinelle Grey for bringing me to life.


Liza: And these are Rinelle's legal stalking links.

webpage/blog: http://rinellegrey.com

Bio:

Liza: It's been a pleasure having you Reckless. Somehow I thought you be a difficult interview, but I found you delightful.

Reckless: Same here. I really hate to leave.

Liza: I'm sure Rinelle has cleaned the ship up by now. *glares at Space Rep* and I'm sure no further garbage will mysteriously show up in the future. Right Space Rep?

Space Rep: Right on. Now in the transporter and off you go...
 Space Rep: *Wipes brow* Thanks for not ratting on me.

Liza: I got your back, Space Rep. But next time you need to dump the space poop send it to Brazilian Biba on planet Alegra.

And Peeps. Leave a comment. Space Rep and I thrive on positive comments.

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Liza O Reviews Ulterior Motive by Chandra Ryan

Welcome peeps, to my first book review on my Multiverse Blog. It will immediately reproduce on millions of blogs across universes. It's truly a heady feeling.


That's what I look like when I'm having a "heady feeling".

Today I want to tell you about Ulterior Motive by Chandra Ryan.
The first thing I thought when I saw this cover was Holy Space Cowboys and Girls we got us cowboys in Outer Space!

For some reason, I like that. 

So I read the Blurb:


Universal Defiance, Book One


On a rural settler planet, Kat must resort to putting out an ad to find a husband. She doesn’t expect to find love—that’s a dream in these parts—just a partner to help work her ranch. Then the devastatingly handsome Jasper answers her ad and turns her on in ways she never dreamed possible. Too bad he’s not who he says he is.

Jasper doesn’t know what he’s getting into when he ventures undercover to investigate a legal claim against Kat’s ranch. But after a toe-curling night under her roof and in her bed, he’s willing to do anything to stay there. He can’t say no to the tough-as-nails businesswoman who makes his body come alive.

When people start getting hurt, though, both Kat and Jasper have to decide how valuable one piece of land is. And the ranch that brought them together might be the very thing standing between them.

A Romantica® sci fi erotic romance from Ellora’s Cave


Sounds good. Right?
So I read an excerpt:


When he opened the door to the guestroom, though, the blaring of an alarm stopped him from going any farther. At first he thought he’d somehow triggered the noise but as soon as he smelled the first wisps of smoke, understanding filled him. Something was on fire. He wanted to rush out into the safety of the open grounds but he fought against the instinct. He had to make sure Kat got out as well.

He raced back to the bathroom to find her standing in the hallway, wrapped in nothing but a towel, with her dark hair flung over one shoulder in a curly mess. There were no tears or hysterical rants despite the fear clearly reflected in her expression.

His job required him to make quick assessments of situations and he excelled at it. But sometimes that left him blind to the more subtle aspects of life. He’d seen a competent businesswoman when he’d first laid eyes on Katarina Maxim. She’d been nothing but efficient and practical from the moment she held her hand out to him. But now, as she shivered in front of him with alarms going off in the background, he realized how much he’d missed in that original assessment. He’d seen her as a businesswoman but the person standing in front of him now possessed so much more.

The vulnerability of the moment and her calm resolve in meeting it added to her strength and touched him.

“I came to find you as soon as I heard the alarm.”

“Most men would’ve gone to battle the blaze first.”

His heart sank at her words. She saw him as a coward. Not that it mattered how she saw him. He wasn’t really trying out for the role of her husband. As soon as he finished his report, he’d be on his way back to his real life. But her words still stung. He’d like to be the hero at least once. To be the one who rushed in and saved the day.

“Don’t look at me like I just kicked your damn puppy. I meant that as a compliment. Most men stupidly let their hormones control them and they tend to get in the way,” she added as she walked past him. “I’ve never been impressed with the gender as a whole.”
He felt fairly certain they did not share the same understanding of the word “compliment” but didn’t dare ask for a clarification as she bustled down the hallway all businesslike.

So I wanted to read this. Never mind I don't have time to be reading stuff given all the books I need to edit. But it's a novelette. How long could it possibly take to read?

Don't even get me started there. So much to do, so little time to do it.

However, I was a bit ahead of schedule today (I'm behind schedule as I write this) so I read it and here's what I thought.

THE REVIEW
Ulterior motives not only exist between Kat and her bought-and-paid-for-mail-ordered husband, Jasper, but they exist between Kat and unknown villains who want her ranch.

Sounds like a great historical western, doesn’t it?

You’d be sooooo wrong. It’s set in the future, where the outback becomes the outlying planets. It’s a futuristic Sci-Fi Spicy Romance, only seven chapters long, but stuffed full of goodies. It’s got a great plot, an endearing hero and heroine, and lot’s of hot spicey sex going on inside its covers.

Chandra Ryan has a lovely voice that pulls you into the story, which flows beautifully, culminating into the perfect and most satisfying solution. While the hero does something shocking to protect the woman he loves, I was 100% with him on the decision. He did what had to be done. And I thought better of him for doing it.

For me, the book started off like a 4.5 star book, which is really really good. But then halfway through it kicks up its shoes and ended in a blazing 5 stars. 

So I’m baffled what to give this…a weird 4.75 or go with ending and give it a 5?
Average or End Result?

 I’m going with the End Result. 

I give Ulterior Motive 5 stars for a completely satisfying conclusion to the plot, the people, and a grand set up for a great future.

It left me totally satisfied! 

Well done Chandra Ryan!


Buy links:


About Author:
Being from a rather nomadic family, Chandra Ryan loves to travel and meet people. But she’s found that sometimes, like when you’re stuck inside because of a good old-fashioned Southwestern heat wave, you have to make do. Fortunately for her and her loving family, who don’t like seeing her suffer from cabin fever, she’s found creating new people and places equally as fascinating. Also, you’re a lot less likely to spill your ice tea.

Author Links:

Twitter: @ChandraRyan

Be sure to leave a comment, because I work for comments. They make me happy. And I'm sure they'll make Chandra happy too. 

Thursday, July 25, 2013

Liza O Space-naps Sandra C. Stixrude to talk about Marya: Anchorage #1

Today, I've kidnapped author Sandra C. Stixrude to talk about her book Marya: Anchorage #1.

Space Rep: Exactly how do you space-nap a person?

Liza: I'm not telling the whole world?  Then they'll improve their security and I won't be able to space-nap people.

Space Rep: You know it's illegal to abduct any sentient being, don't you?

Liza: Well, technically I'm not abducting them. I'm inviting them to come tell me about their book and then help me promote mine.

Space Rep: Your book isn't even Sci Fi.

Liza: My book is funny. All species need to laugh. You just don't want to be in snorting range of some.

Space Rep: But--

Liza: No more questions. It's time to download my very first space victim. Can anyone tell who it is?

Space Rep: I'm guessing Sandra C Stixrude.

Liza: Excellent job Space Rep. Let's all welcome Sandra to our space ship.




Space Rep: More like junk heap.

Liza: Hey, it's all I can afford. Now let's remove Sandra's helmet so she can see. 


Welcome Sandra, Thanks for coming to my spaceship.

Sandra: Thanks, I didn't 'come' you wrapped me in a riot tube and put a visonless helmet on me so I could neither see nor scream for help.





Liza: Sorry if I gave you a bit of fright. I just wanted talk about your book. Marya: Anchorage#1.

Sandra: And your first thought was to space-nap me?

Liza: No, it was my second thought.

Sandra: I'm afraid to ask. What was your first?

Liza: To obtain sufficient biological matter to clone you, only the idea of duplicating the environmental occurrences that turned you into an author seemed impossible to recreate. So I went with plan #2--Retrieve Sandra for a marketing gig that lasts three days.

Sandra: So you put me into a riot tube and abducted me in my sleep for what you claim to be a marketing gig.

Liza: Exactly!

Sandra: You could have just called, you know. Could you remove the riot tube?

Liza: Sorry, no.

Sandra: Why not?

Liza: Because I've determined if I do that, my marketing experts immediately go home.

Sandra: I feel like a sushi roll. *growls* 

Liza: Please don't do that. You're scaring my space kitty.  


I cloned Yogi2 from an earthbound kidnapping. Yogi came to rescue his pet Kylie who was tied up. I was impressed by his ability to shoot laser beams from his eyes.

So I made a clone, which I named Yogi2. 

Sandra: Didn't you say you wanted to discuss my book?  

Liza: Yes, please.

Sandra: Can we get to that point? Because most people will stop reading pretty soon.

Liza: No. I've put a stop to that.  You know the camera that resides on all communication devices now?


Sandra: No.

Liza: Well there is one, and from it, I can monitor if my readers are reading, skimming, or falling asleep. If the latter two happen. I teleport over Yogi2 to give them a laser zap. Believe me, they read my whole blog.

Sandra: And you can get people to subscribe to your blogs knowing this.

Liza: As an author, you should know we aren't allowed to TELL things anymore. We can only SHOW. Now to your book.  I'll put the cover up again in case people have forgotten what it looked like and you tell, er, show me in visual language what it's about. 

Sandra: Good idea.

Marya--the scholarly priestess-healer. Her integrity and quick intelligence have singled her out for a dangerous task. Roke--Knight Captain of the Tersha. His quiet demeanor hides deadly secrets. He disturbs her peace of mind. She disrupts his life, divides his loyalties and his heart.
Their meeting will change worlds


Liza: Interesting. So recite to me by memory your favorite excerpt.

Sandra:  You could just release me from this tube so I could read it to you.

Liza: Not happening. Start reciting.

Excerpt:

Sharp and keening, the notes sounded as if they were played along the edge of a thin sheet of metal in an endless, wavering cascade. Feren shivered and his head jerked up, his eyes glazed.

"It's so beautiful," he whispered.

"Beautiful wasn't the word I was thinking of," Marya responded, puzzled. "Bizarre, maybe."

Feren gave no sign he heard her. He rose and lurched toward the sound, tripping blindly over packs and bedrolls. Every male in the camp had bolted out of a sound sleep and stumbled to their feet.

What is wrong with them? She grasped Feren by the arm and shook him, calling to him, but he shambled forward, deaf to her entreaties. Harrel staggered past her, oblivious to her calls. She picked up the nearest pot and tossed the cold water over his head. He neither flinched nor paused.

"Sabiana!" Marya screamed. "Gather up what you can and get everything on the harduks! I can't stop them and we can't lose sight of them in the dark!"

The girl was awake, wide-eyed and whimpering, but she fought down her panic enough to act. Roke's compulsive need for a tidy camp meant they had secured every loose item the night before. Sabiana had only to throw the packs onto various beasts. Bedrolls, weapons, armor, coats and boots she tossed in jumbled piles and hoisted them as best she could, securing them in ways that would have made the experienced travelers among them cringe.

Marya flung herself in front of Roke and put both hands against his chest to try to stop his progress. Her boots slipped and scrabbled backward on the stones as he leaned forward and continued as if she were no more than a strong breeze. She slapped him hard across the face. Nothing. He simply kept stumbling forward with the others, making their way up the slope, over rocks and between boulders, away from the winding mountain road.

Marya threw the remaining arms and armor onto Storm's back and attached the lead reins of each harduk to the one in front. She tossed the saddle onto Windflower, hoped she had managed to fasten the girth correctly, and shouted for Sabiana to get Sunshadow. Moondancer would not allow her near him, though. He rolled his eyes as he backed and reared.

"Hush!" she called in anguish as the men disappeared around a bend in the slope. "Talk to Moondancer! We have to go after them now!"

The leemacat, who had begun to follow Feren, raced back down the slope, "bad song, ears hurt, afraid"

"I know, Hush, I'm afraid, too." Marya shouted as she pulled herself up onto Windflower's back. "But we have to stay with them and stay together. Bring Moondancer." She started Windflower up the slope and called back to Sabiana, "Grab Storm's reins and follow me, the rest of the harduks will follow him."

Windflower scrambled up the rocky slope, not a natural thing for a harduk bred for flat plains and marshes. They struggled around the bend where she had seen the men disappear, and Marya spotted a well-worn track, hidden from the road, which wound upward between sheer walls of rock. If she had not been watching, she would have thought the mountain had swallowed them up. She let out a long breath when she saw them ahead of her again, and waited until Sabiana and the rest of the harduks clattered up behind her.

The going was easier here, the smooth path rose on a gentle gradient and she soon caught up to the men who shambled toward the eerie music.

They continued this way for over an hour, the music increasing in volume, escalating from skin-crawling irritation to aural agony. As they climbed, the air turned bitter, damp, and cold. Heavy, leaden clouds cloaked what little of the sky remained visible. With the exception of Jovan, who had been on watch, and Roke, who slept in his boots, most of the men were barefoot, their feet soon torn and bleeding.

Ferocious and sudden, the storm struck, as if they had walked into a wall of snow and howling wind. The whirling eddies of white made it difficult to see more than two or three feet and Marya called to Sabiana and Hush to gather in as close as possible.

"Whose boots are those?" Marya pointed to the pommel in front of her apprentice.

"I don't know, Holiness," Sabiana yelled back, struggling to be heard above storm and song. "They have red leaves on the cuffs."

"Those are Liam's. Come help me!" With a quick look around, Maya spotted the youngster struggling over a patch of loose shale. She slid from the saddle and dashed across the path to him. With Sabiana grappling his ankles and Marya catching him as he fell, they managed to bring him down in a tangled heap of limbs. Liam still tried to crawl forward, but with both of them hanging on to one leg at a time, they stuffed his feet into the boots.

They located Liam's coat on Sunshadow's saddle, stuffed his arms in the sleeves, and then the process was repeated with Koros. Harrel proved nearly impossible and had to be flipped onto his back before they could shove his boots on him. The attempt to tackle Feren failed miserably. They had to hold the boots out for him to step into, which worked after a few fingers had been trodden upon.

Marya left Roke until last, since at least he already had his boots on. The blank, distant look in those fierce eyes disturbed her. After shoving his arms into the sleeves, she grabbed him by his coat lapels, hooking her crooked left-hand fingers through the top buttonhole and shook him hard, his head snapping back and forth.

"You're an agent of the Koss, for Alia's sake!" she shouted above the storm. "You're supposed to be this resourceful, driven man. This unstoppable force. Fight this! Come back out of it or I'll never believe the stories about Koss assassins ever again."

His eyes flickered, but even if he heard her, he was unable to fight free of the music's grasp.

At the top of one of the steeper rises in the path, a soft blue glow became visible. Marya peered through the driving snow and rubbed her eyes, unsure whether the glow was real or a symptom of snow blindness. It became brighter and more distinct as they struggled toward its source. Perhaps from some isolated house or temple, someone there would know what was wrong with the men and how to stop the horrible music.

As they drew closer, the nature of the light became clear. A cold, sickly-blue glow greeted them rather than the honest, welcoming light of hearthfire or candle. Even worse, the dreadful, metallic music emanated from the light.

Both beacon and nerve-grating singing came from what appeared to be an impossible woman standing on the top of the hill. Over twenty feet tall, heavy flowing material robed her. It fell from her shoulders in pleats that covered her to her feet, but left her arms bare. The light shone from her, but provided little actual illumination. The woman's face was beautiful with a kind and sympathetic smile, her arms opened to the men stumbling toward her through the storm. The gigantic figure was strangely translucent, as if the eye could pass within the robes folds but not penetrate to the other side. Marya shuddered. This was the singer from Feren's terrifying dreams of being paralyzed and trapped.

"Holiness, what is that thing?" Sabiana shouted, her voice thin and wavering.

The girl's question jarred Marya—not who, but what. Movement around the gigantic figure's feet resolved into human-sized hooded figures, walking through, as well as around her.

Marya gestured Sabiana closer. "It's not living. Watch the people by her. She's just an image, like a picture. I've never seen such a thing before. I don't know how it works, but don't be afraid, my dear. We have people to deal with here, not some gigantic monster."

As they drew near, the dark, hooded figures herded the men through the image one by one, the largest first. Marya tried to ask what they were doing, but the music was too loud.

The hooded figure directing the others grabbed the nearest person by the elbow, pointed to Marya and Sabiana, and shouted something. "Sanctuary" and "out of the way" and "hunt" drifted through the dual shriek of notes and wind. Not entirely reassuring. One person took Windflower's bridle and another grabbed Sunshadow's, leading them off the path.

They had herded all of the men except Roke out of sight through the image. A figure on the far side of the path produced a palm-length, black box from a coat pocket and pressed the top of the box. The giant woman disappeared and the music ceased. The relief from the horrible noise was so intense it took a moment to realize what had happened behind the concealing wall of that huge image.

The path swarmed with more hooded figures, some on foot and some on harduk-back. An iron wagon hitched behind four draft harduks provided the center of activity. Built onto this wagon was a box of closely set horizontal and vertical iron bars—a cage—the back held open with another iron bar. Inside on the floor, sprawled her boys, Jovan, Koros, Liam, and Crollus. They had been stripped of coats, weapons, boots and shirts, their hands bound in front, a black metal collar around each of their necks.

This was no rescue from the storm. This was a kidnapping. They were repeating the process with Roke, his coat taken from him, his hands tightly bound at the wrists. He swayed, shaking his head groggily.

Marya shrieked, "What do you think you're doing? Let them go! You have no right to treat us this way!"

At the sound of her voice, Roke's head snapped up, his eyes narrowing. Even with his hands tied, he whirled and kicked the feet out from under the figure behind him. That one went down with a heavy thud and Roke spun and landed a leaping kick to the chest of the one in front. Lowering his head, he barreled into the one on his right and knocked that one flat as well.



Free of grasping hands, he looked around wildly, staggered forward three steps, and vaulted onto Storm's back. He dragged himself upright, bound hands looped over the pommel and kicked the stallion into a run before he slumped forward. Storm galloped on and Roke, born to the saddle, kept his seat. The harduk's white coat and the white of his shirt blended into the blizzard, man and beast soon swallowed by the whirling snow.

Liza: Wow! You've got one amazing memory. And here are the links to buy this fabulous book.






Liza: Now all that's left is for you to say something meaningful about Worst Week Ever.

Sandra: Let's see. It only lasts a week?

Liza: Wrong. Trent mucked that up. Try again.

Sandra:  It sounds like Carrie's week was even worse than being spacenapped. Worst Week Ever looks hilarious.

Liza: Ding, ding, ding! Correct answer. Thank you for coming to promote my book. 

Sandra: Grrrrr. Will you release me now?

Liza: No we play Ground Hog for three days, and then Space Rep will let you go while I hide in my safe room. I've been warned space-napping is inherently more dangerous than kidnapping humans.
But I really appreciate you stopping by and you can use my human transporter to go home. It seems to work okay.

And Space Peeps, leave lots of comments. Sandra and I love comments. It's candy to our souls.

Monday, July 22, 2013

Breaking Space News with Patty Hammond

Welcome, life forms of the universes, today I am interviewing Patty Hammond. She says she's having a character answer my questions, but that's the oldest deflection in the universes.

For example, I once had a friend who stole two blue lawnchairs, because she thought they'd look nice on the outside of her spaceship.

Get it? Wink Wink.

Space Rep? I don't get it.

Liza: Look at my banner.

Space Rep: Oh, those blue chairs. Are you saying Patty is a chair thief? Oddly, I have to arrest people for that offense...if they admit it and sign 43,978 forms.

Liza: No, I'm saying Patty is hiding behind this 'alleged' character, and my peeps should assume all answers are hers. 

Space Rep: Did she manipulate the creation of digital transmissions which are considered legal in a court of judicial interpretations?

Liza: I have no idea what you just asked.

Space Rep: *Sighs* Did she type the answers to your questions?

Liza: Yes.

Space Rep: The JIP agrees with you. Patty and this character are considered to reside in the same biological unit and are thus the same.

Liza: You spent a half a page just to agree with me?

Space Rep: Reluctantly, yes, I did.

Liza: Out!

Space Rep slinks off.

Liza: Peace at last. So let's transport in Patty and pretend this character really exists.

< That's the human transporter. I got it used. Hope it works... Patty will be the first person I test it on.  I did a test with a grapefruit. However, the results were inconclusive. It came back cut in two with the fleshy part eaten, but I'm not sure what that means. Oh well, too late to worry about it now. 

HERE'S PATTY!  I hope....
Oh, Thank God! Patty, how do you feel? Everything where it should be? 

Patty: I'm fine. Thanks for sending your hostess package to my ship. I really enjoyed the grapefruit. It was delicious!

Liza: *wipes brow* My pleasure. Anything to make my guest comfortable. Are you ready to begin your interview?

Patty: Given how long this blog already is, I think we should. Now you do understand I've created a character to answer your strange questions. I am just a normal human living on Earth. I haven't even written a short story, let alone a book.


BREAKING SPACE NEWS--No time to Fact Check

Finally discovered: A human who has NOT written a book or even a short story. Reports are Amazon has already sent out an enforcer team to encourage her to write the tragic story of her demise before they eliminate her.

Patty: What was that?

Liza: Oh, ignore those. I assure you my peeps pay no attention to them.

Space Rep: Yes, we do. 

Liza: Let me get to the obvious question on everyone's mind. Are you human or alien?

Patty: Well, my character is a human and alien hybrid created during an experiment in gene manipulation on a space station just outside the Motara Nebula.

Liza: Reeeeaaaally. *Wink Wink* And why are you lurking about Earth NOT writing any stories?


Patty:  I came to Earth to find out more about my human history and heritage.  As an archivist, I am interested in learning more and Earth has an abundance of history still left to explore because of all the information that has been lost throughout time.


BREAKING SPACE NEWS--No time to Fact Check


Patty AKA PattyBones has arrived on Earth to strip mine it of Data. She says there's "an abundance of history" to be found and harvested.


Patty: I didn't say that.

Liza: Seriously, you need to ignore those. Space News often gets the facts wrong. Now I understand you don't dream at night, only in the daytime. Can you share your dreams?

Patty: I dream about finding a lost city like Atlantis or New York or some other lost city from Earth’s past.


BREAKING SPACE NEWS--No time to Fact Check

Patty AKA Patty De Bones plots to steal New York City as those before her have stolen Atlantis and other cities that we no longer even know existed.



Patty: I am plotting what? 

Liza: Let's change topics. Maybe you won't provoke them if we talk of something over their head. Do you believe in Multiverses, also referred to as parallel universes? 

Patty:  I believe they exist, theoretically.  However, based on all the historical research I have done across this universe, I have found no evidence of the parallel universes ever crossing paths or leaving evidence of someone from another universe leaving traces in ours.

Liza: Now you've riled me! No evidence? What causes Deja Vu if not the collapsing of universes into one another because their time-differences are no longer statistically relevant? And what about people who see and talk to those we can't see? What are they, if not residual lives caught during a collapse of universes? And what about missing time? You head off to work and then you're there and you don't remember the drive at all. These happen to everyone constantly. What more proof could you possibly need?

Space Rep: You might want to run now.

Patty: I have a bad feeling about this. Maybe you're right.

Liza: No wait, let's find a new topic. Tell me the worst moment of your life, and don't say this interview.

Patty: My worst week ever is part of my worst year ever.  I was on a plane on September 11, 2001 going to Las Vegas with my husband, while the attacks were happening.  

Our plane was forced to land in Denver, Colorado without much explanation.  We were told nothing except that we were landing, by FAA orders, at Denver International Airport.    BTW, all the planes landing were being escorted to the runway by Air Force jets, from NORAD.  


When we got off the plane into the terminal, there was one person to greet us and all she could say was “Stay Here!  Do not move! This has never happened before!” and she was crying when she left us there without any further information. 


We were in the dark about the events that were happening. All the TVs were off in the Airport and the terminal was deserted except for us.  Lucky, my husband had his cell phone on him and was able to call his best friend.  That is when we found out what happened.  


 Needless to say it was the saddest week we ever experienced. 



Liza: I was in Canada hiking when the twin towers fell, only it was September the 12th. Then the next day everyone said it occurred on September 11th, so I figured two universes collapsed into one and Sept 11th won out and went with the flow. No point in arguing with Quantum Physics. You never want to annoy the quarks.

Patty: Quarks? You are very strange. 

Liza: Who's your favorite Sci-Fi writer?

Patty: Lois McMaster Bujold and I blog about her often.

Liza: Why isn't it me?

Patty: Because I found Bujold first!

Liza: Oh, I thought it might be because my SkyRyders series won't be out until sometime in 2014

Patty: Well that could be--


BREAKING SPACE NEWS--No time to Fact Check


Our investigators have uncovered more disturbing facts about Patty AKA Pat de Bones

Patty Hammond is an everyday fangirl who is disguised as a mild mannered data analyst for an advertising agency in Michigan. She's really smart, travels and reads alot.

You can find her online either blogging on her site, Everydayfangirl, or posting on various social media sites including Facebook and Twitter under the ID of PattyBones.

Patty de Bones should be considered armed with sufficient knowledge and experience to make NYC, or any city, disappear. If you come in contact with Patty, the best course is to give up your data and run like the wind.


Patty: That's it! I've had it with the Breaking News. I'm want to go back to my ship now!

Liza: Probably a good idea. When they get this riled up there's no stopping them. Thanks for coming on my blog. It's been fun.

Patty: Bye, I had a good time...I think.
                * Disappears into the tall skinny microwave*


Patty's Links
Twitter handle @pattybones2
Facebook PattyBones2


Liza: Don't forget to leave a comment. Patty and I love comments. They are candy to our souls. And feel free to subscribe to my blog so they should up in your empty email box and make your day.